Funny Halloween Houses - by mentaljokes.com!

Q: What directions did the ghost give the goblin?
A: "Make a fright turn at the corner."

Why don't skeletons ever go out on the town?
Because they don't have any body to go out with...

Make Some Hanging
Hanging Transparent Ghosts!

Here is what you need:

Clear plastic wrap
Plastic drinking straw
Black yarn
Self-stick reinforces
Black marker
Clear tape

Here is what you do:

Rip off a square of plastic wrap. Tie the wrap over the top of the straw so that it hangs down evenly around to form a ghost. Blow up the head of the ghost through the straw. Carefully pull the straw out and tie the yarn tight in a bow to capture the air.
Color two hole reinforces black and stick them on the head of the ghost for eyes. Tape a piece of yarn to the back of the ghost's head to hang it from the ceiling.
If your ghost loses air after a while, just insert the straw and blow it
up again.

A great snack and craft project in one:

Worms and Mud in a Pot!

What you need:

8 inch flower pot & trowel
(use the right pot)
8 oz. softened cream cheese
Large package of Oreo cookies
1/2 stick softened margarine or butter
12 oz. Cool whip or other whipped topping
3/4 cup powdered sugar
2 3/4 cup milk
2 small package instant French vanilla pudding
1 package of Gummy Worms

What you do:

Crush well the package of Oreo cookies (set aside).
Cream together 1/2 stick of margarine or butter,8 oz. package cream cheese, 3/4 cup powdered sugar (set aside).
Mix together- 2 3/4 C. milk, 2 packages pudding.
Combine- #2 and #3 and mix well.
Fold In-12 oz. Cool Whip
Using an 8" flower pot, plugging bottom of pot with lid from cool whip. Layer ingredients in pot starting with cookie crumbs then pudding mixture and inserting the gummies continue until ending with cookie crumbs on top. Refrigerate overnight if possible.
Add artificial flowers before serving for decoration
Serve with trowel.

Click for free Halloween Wallpaper and Halloween Screensavers!

Skeleton Chauffeur

Take your desktop for a haunted ride with this Skeleton chauffeur! Make no bones about it, this is going to be one dreadful drive!

THE TOP 15 COMPLAINTS OF MODERN DAY VAMPIRES

15. Grunge look makes it tough to tell living from the undead.
14. Nutrasweet or not, fat-free blood tastes like crap.
13. Hard to get a decent puncture with latex on your fangs.
12. Three Words: Daylight Savings Time
11. Can't enjoy a meal at Burger King without some redneck yelling, "Look
Ma! It's Elvis!"
10. After 45 years of Communist rule, it's impossible to find clean,
uncontaminated Transylvanian soil for bottom of coffin.
09. After 100 years of trying, still can't score with Elvira.
08. No bat is safe with Ozzy Ozbourne around.
07. With all those crucifix-wearing Madonna clones, junior highs are suddenly
off-limits.
06. No warm blood for miles around DC.
05. Exhausted from all those Calvin Klein photo shoots.
04. No small task beating F. Lee Bailey to a warm body.
03. Buxom wenches of old have been replaced by aerobisized "hard bodies."
02. Baboon heart makes everything taste gamy.
And the #1 complaint of Modern-day Vampires:
01. Sick and tired of being mistaken for Keith Richards.

trick or treat ... candy or crap?
(a Halloween shockwave game to play online)
.test your skill... think you've been practicing enough all
these years to play now?
well, let's see then...